Psychobabble!
The way you choose
You have a purpose, so choose it. You have control, so use it.
What happens to you isn’t the end of the story. What really makes a difference is what you do with it.
Excuses and complaints give you comfort, but little else. Positive intention, commitment, action, discipline and persistence are what create a life of great fulfillment.
You are not your past, you are not your job title, you are not your bank balance or the car you drive or the neighborhood where you live. You are who you choose to be, and the way you choose to act, in this new moment.
The possibilities are limited only by your imagination, so imagine from your deepest, driving purpose. Feel the passion as it wells up within you, and let it energize every part of your life.
Live by choice, not by chance. This irreplaceable moment is now here, so act to make its great value uniquely yours.
— Ralph Marston
One thing I value most: stability.
keep on, or move out.
You know what I’m tired of hearing?
“Enjoy these days - they’re the best ones of your life”
Such a well intentioned comment, but it drives me crazy…why? because if these are the best days of my life, why the heck am I working so hard? I understand where people are coming from…I mean, college is a time where you decide what you do, when you do it, how you do it, without having to worry significantly about anyone else. You have no spouse, no dependents…(except for a possible beta fish that requires about 2.5 seconds of food shaking/day). You have fun - lots of it, and best of all - you don’t have to deal with bills, mortgages, etc. Alright, I get it, college life is fantastic.
But why? So many times I talk about things that I look forward to in the future - being a pediatric nurse, having my own youth choir, marrying the one, having a holy marriage, being a really good mother, loving a family, visiting Italy, working at a pediatric hospital, advancing my education in a really cool way, growing in faith, hope, love, selflessness, humility, and oh does the list go on….
And what do I get for these aspirations? “Nothing in life is perfect. You’ll see - you’re just a young idealist”
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I’m far from perfect. And the world we live in is crap sometimes - most of the time. We’ve got sin and selfishness everywhere from sex trafficking, to power hungry child soldier enslavers, to prideful religious fighters, to pornography, to abuse, to drug addiction, to suicide, to death, to hatred. It is not easy to deal with these horrific things. But should we adjust what we dream about, what we strive for? Which makes me think…
Isn’t everyone an idealist in a way?
Everyone has a desire to be happy. We have an idealistic view of the world. We think - what would be IDEAL for ME? For some it may seem to be copious amounts of sexual satisfaction. For some it’s ruling the world or just having control. For others, it’s having all the answers - or maybe just not having to answer to anyone. Maybe it’s a high or worse, a complete loss of life. These are extremes. Extremely selfish ideals. And generally they are results of other selfish ideals before them.
But what about the average person? - simply wants a good education, beautiful wedding day, a happy marriage, a well paying job, a dog with no fleas, kids without disabilities, scholarships for their college education, security, no affairs, grandchildren, fun, no cancer, and death in their sleep.
That’s not selfish, is it? I don’t think so. But what if some things go wrong? Then selfishness can make its way into our lives. “I don’t deserve this. This is his fault. I have done enough. How could this happen to me. I can’t afford this. Why so much suffering?” We will blame. We will suffer. We will be so disappointed that we might say to someone else…..
“Nothing in life is perfect. You’ll see - you’re just a young idealist”
You’re right - I’ll see. I’ll see the late nights in the hospital with no dinner break and so many kids in pain. I’ll see children die. I’ll see a youth choir fail at times and I’ll see humiliation. Yes, I will see that marriage isn’t just an awesome, expensive party where I get to be the hottest one in the room. I will see that marriage is more than just for better, but for worse. Maybe the worst of the worst. Yep, I’ll even see that a holy marriage is not something that is common, easy, or even halfway attainable at times. I’ll see disappointment and hurt in a marriage. I’ll see hoplessness and despair when I fall short or when he does. I’ll see endless poopy diapers and sleepless nights. I’ll see failure, lack of effort, even hatred from kids. I’ll see C’s on papers, lost soccer games, bad conduct. I may even see a lack of faith, hope, and love in kids one day. I’ll see difficulty loving a family when I feel unloved. I’ll see guilt and sadness when I don’t show the greatest love. Yep, maybe I’ll even see a 6 hour delay on my long awaited trip to Italy or I just won’t be able to get there because of my crazy life. I’ll see a very stressful pediatric hospital and maybe I’ll see a very difficult and demanding boss. At some point, I’m sure I won’t see free time. I’ll see doubt, despair, and hatred. I’ll see the world continue to be full of selfishness and pain. I’ll see imperfection, cause good gracious - it is no cake walk growing in virtue. I’ll see.
BUT
….do you know what else I’ll see?
I’ll see a 5 year old smiling at me because that shot I gave her was not as painful as she thought. I’ll see thankful and loving parents. I’ll see a child who survives cancer. And I’ll have the blessing of helping. I’ll see and hear the beautiful music that a youth choir can make with effort. I’ll see talent and joy. I’ll see love, I’ll learn love, I’ll grow in love. And I’ll see that the supposed “best day of my life” will be nothing compared to the selfless love I can have through God with a husband. I’ll see that those hardest and most difficult times will strengthen that love if it is truly selfless. I’ll see a holy marriage. I’ll see a cute baby looking up at me. I’ll see a Christmas morning with kids freaking out about Santa. I’ll see innocent joy and love. I’ll see growth, strength, and happiness in my family. I’ll see Sunday breakfast after Mass and playing hide and seek. I’ll see the joy that unconditional love brings. Maybe I won’t see Italy, but that’s ok. I’m sure I’ll see other beautiful things. I’ll see satisfaction when I do my job right, but more importantly, when I positively influence someone’s life. I’ll see a bit of faith, hope, and love - and maybe one day in their complete fullness in heaven. I’ll see.
These may be much fewer, but they should never be forgotten. Because genuine love surpasses all selfishness. And frankly, I just don’t think it’s right to dismiss it.
So call me an idealist. An optimist. A dreamer. A believer. Because despite our own faults, hatred, and selfishness…….with faith in God, there is hope in good and unending love.
Sounds pretty ideal to me.
We’ll see… ;)
Just stole this from a wonderful person, Stephanie Jensen!
Instructions:
1.) Watch.
2.) Laugh.
3.) Repeat.
so true.
Anonymous Asks:
kpenza Said:
Hearts of Gold will never go away. It’s consistent as no concrete thing imaginable. Once you have it, you can’t not have it. If you have a heart filled with gold, or even just a little, you’re blessed beyond God.
We all need someone to look at us. We can be divided into four categories according to the kind of look we wish to live under. The first category longs for the look of an infinite number of anonymous eyes, in other words, for the look of the public. The second category is made up of people who have a vital need to be looked at by many known eyes. They are the tireless hosts of cocktail parties and dinners. They are happier than the people in the first category, who, when they lose their public, have the feeling that the lights have gone out in the room of their lives. This happens to nearly all of them sooner or later. People in the second category, on the other hand, can always come up with the eyes they need. Then there is the third category, the category of people who need to be constantly before the eyes of the person they love. Their situation is as dangerous as the situation of people in the first category. One day the eyes of their beloved will close, and the room will go dark. And finally there is the fourth category, the rarest, the category of people who live in the imaginary eyes of those who are not present. They are the dreamers.
I think everyone has a little of each person in them.
(via myquotelibrary)
(via nickiprice14)
nothing’s fair.